I feel becoming a Singaporean man now

Do you know why? Let me explain to you:

• I am a Chinese so I look like a local
• I speak Chinese like Jet Li when he doesn't punch somebody...That means a little bit!
• I usually eat spicy food because my stomach appreciates that. I have to say that the toilets ( the restrooms,washrooms, the loo, the john) don't share this opinion...
• I am invisible to the Indians selling clothes,suits silk etc.
• I often spit like them when I am in the toilets...Let's share our saliva!
• I like making noise when I glide instead of walking...I am a shambler!
• I prefer not to speak out because foreigners are not Singaporeans (logic right?) yeah!
• I wanna strangle an auntie when she shouts in Hokkien instead of talking... Mai hiam!

You know that I am a good guy!